I had graduated quite recently as a visual artist when I participated in a portfolio review meeting at a local artist-run gallery. They had invited well established artists to review young artists’ portfolios. We had several one-on-one meetings during the day and I was really excited to get to present my works and to hear their comments.

I was only just taking my baby steps as an artist while he was already a distinguished artist and art teacher. Not only did he not appreciate my work: he basically laughed at my art as we were browsing through my portfolio, and he told me that I should be exhibiting my art at a hairdresser’s salon or a clothing store, rather than in a gallery. I was so confused and embarrassed at his reaction and brazen comments that I simply laughed along to his comments.

Afterwards, I felt horrible. This triggered a period during which I was very seriously questioning my ability to make art. For quite some time, maybe even for the next couple of years, every single time an application of mine for a grant was rejected, every time I was not accepted for an exhibition I wanted to present at or when someone else was chosen for an artist residency I hoped to win, in my head I would hear his laughter and cruel comments about my artistic abilities and work. Every time this happened, I began questioning myself and my art all over again, wondering if he may have been right after all and if I should continue trying.

However, nowadays it doesn’t bother me anymore. With time and experience, I have realised that this artist’s concept of “good” or “proper” art was quite narrow, and that my own work would anyways never have been something he would have respected or valued. And that is fine by me: I am no longer seeking other people’s approval of my own art. Though the way he treated me, as a young and aspiring artist, was cruel, unnecessarily rude, and pedagogically stupid. I am quite certain that he could have provided me with some useful advice if he wanted to.