In 2015, I was invited to participate in one of Finland’s biggest summer contemporary art exhibitions. I presented my work “Social Landscapes” – an idea about collecting quotes from local entrepreneurs to capture their attitudes towards foreigners/immigrants. I used direct quotes from the interviews to visualize and present them on the walls of local cafes and restaurants. 

One of the works I was working on was on the inside walls of the pizza place. The owner had seen the sketch and agreed to do it. I worked about a week on it, and the work was ready one day before the festival’s opening. I finished the work in the evening, and the artwork was repainted entirely when I returned the next day. My work was just gone. I was shocked and felt disappointed. 

I went to the festival headquarters and shouted and cried and asked if they could just explain why they allowed this thing to happen, but instead of an explanation, they told me not to tell anyone about this. Definitely not to tell the media. I was left alone. I felt like I had committed a massive crime or something. But I was not sure what the crime was about as I had other works in other cafes and restaurants, and they were all just fine, but this one was the biggest and was very important for the whole project to work as a whole. 

I think it was an apparent censorship. The owner probably had second thoughts and asked the festival organizers to repaint it.

This experience has influenced me quite a lot, and I’m now ready to stand more straight up, fight for my art and be proud of what I do. Because after such rejection, I have often been unsure and doubtful of my art. The wound has been open, and I have just learned to put it aside. One of the reasons I wanted to tell this story is that it will help me to deal with all the things that I still have inside, like this uncertainty that is whether I’m doing alright or if I’m doing it right. 

One of the things that pissed me off is that this was pretty good work in my own eyes, but as the destruction happened so unexpectedly, I didn’t have any time to take even a picture of it!